A: I never had a "Mee-Maw". I had a "Grandmother" ("Oh, I didn't realize you would bring the children. Well, this should make for a unique Christmas") and a "Gram-ma" ("Oh, what the H-E double hockey sticks! It's a holiday. Maybe I will have a second slice of gristle")
B: I'm not Pee-shy. I could pee on live TV.
C: Wherever I can, or cannot poop is none of your business. But I assure you, I will take several reasonable opportunities to NOT bring it to your attention. Regardless of the location of said poo. You are welcome.
Had "Grandmother" only followed her own advice "in any medical situation there's nothing that can't be cured with a good poo", she might still be with us today. And say what you will about "Gram-ma's" eating habits: IE "I'll just have the gristle". She lived to be 119. And I personally didn't see her corpse, so in my head, she faked her own death to get away from (to avoid hurt feelings here I won't use their real names) Dalph & Van.
2 comments:
Note: This posting is a work of fiction.
A: I never had a "Mee-Maw". I had a "Grandmother" ("Oh, I didn't realize you would bring the children. Well, this should make for a unique Christmas") and a "Gram-ma" ("Oh, what the H-E double hockey sticks! It's a holiday. Maybe I will have a second slice of gristle")
B: I'm not Pee-shy. I could pee on live TV.
C: Wherever I can, or cannot poop is none of your business. But I assure you, I will take several reasonable opportunities to NOT bring it to your attention. Regardless of the location of said poo. You are welcome.
Had "Grandmother" only followed her own advice "in any medical situation there's nothing that can't be cured with a good poo", she might still be with us today.
And say what you will about "Gram-ma's" eating habits: IE "I'll just have the gristle". She lived to be 119. And I personally didn't see her corpse, so in my head, she faked her own death to get away from (to avoid hurt feelings here I won't use their real names) Dalph & Van.
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